The Moonies once placed the concept of lineage at the core of everything they did. The whole point of Rev. Moon being the Messiah and carrying on "Jesus' mission" was because, as he claims, Jesus appeared to him at 15 and asked him to finish on Earth the mission he had originally wanted to accomplish, before he was crucified. This divine mission was the establishment of God's bloodline on the physical earth. That's why the mass weddings, termed "The Blessing" is so important-- it's a part of the process of bringing God into your physical bloodline. When you get into the more inner workings of the church, you will find there is (was?) an immense pressure on those children born from those Blessings (like me) to marry within the same bloodline (other children produced from the Blessings) and not to have sexual relations outside of marriage, because it would corrupt the bloodline.
All fine and good. If you believe that Rev. Moon is the Messiah, it actually makes a lot of sense, in my opinion. I began to part ways with him a few years ago; if I had to choose what exactly it was that really started pushing me out the door, I would "blame" my stance on Gay Marriage. But that's a story for another day. The last of this context you need to understand is that I'm an only child, and therefore, put undue pressure on myself to stay within the church--despite my growing disagreement with its core beliefs--because I did not want to screw up everything for my parents, I did not want to "destroy their bloodline" and throw everything they worked for out the window. (My parents, you should know, were and are amazingly supportive of me and continue to insist that my happiness is their greatest priority, despite any conflict they might have encountered as a result of my decisions.)
So I've had some emotional times in these past few years, and some anger to deal with-- anger at Rev. Moon, anger at his children and his appointed church officials, anger at myself for letting my life get so complicated and out of my own hands, etc. I talked with a good friend last night, and we spent some time lamenting the corruption (religious views aside, corruption happens in any large organization, this should not reflect the Unification Church in any unique way) and the regret we felt about our years in the church. Meanwhile, outside my apartment in New York City, it was freezing rain, and I was also lamenting on going outside to get dinner, until...
I found on grubhub.com that the Korean restaurant by campus had delivery service.
I LOVE Korean food. My mother (especially for being Japanese-American) makes a wicked bulgogi, as does my second mother (a woman I lived with in Bowie for a few years) who is white and Boston-raised. I used to hate kimchi, until I made myself eat it (because it gets served at every church event) and now... well, I just finished eating the leftover kimchi for lunch. Kimchi'd squid is probably my favorite food, I go apeshit for that stuff. Literally apeshit; pardon my language, but there is no better word to describe how much I love kimchi'd squid.
I was joking with my roommate how every time I eat Korean food, I instantly forgive Rev. Moon et al. because there's no way I'd have such fondness for it, had I not been so repeatedly exposed to it. We laughed, but the more I think about it (and the more I eat the leftovers), I really mean it. There are worse ways to grow up than in the Unification Church, and honestly, it has helped shape me into a very awesome person--in my own opinion, of course :)
There are reasons to hold onto hate in the world, don't think I'm some Peace and Love hippie monster. There are mothers who literally have no idea how to feed their children the next day, while corrupt government officials languish in their villas. There are people who encourage children to blow themselves up in the name of God, also because said person is too chickenshit to even do it himself. There are people who kill innocents for money and personal gain, whether it be through violence or deprivation. There are people who acknowledge the moral vacuum of their actions, who have the life foundation to simply opt out, and don't, just because they want a little more profit. By all means, hate them-- they have plenty of remorse to discover, and plenty of penance to earn. It's not your job to forgive them, if you can even find it in your soul.
But I don't believe Moon has malicious intent. I think he's wrong, but I do think he truly believes he is the Messiah. And I never starved at his hands, I really haven't had a bad life. And really, I'm alive and I exist-- he matched my parents, and here I am. I no longer feel like I owe him anything, but hey. Thanks, man. I appreciate it.
There are so many people in my position that just can't acknowledge these things: it wasn't all bad. There are people in my position in relation to other things: other churches, their ethnic bakground, their nuclear family. They just hold onto this blame, and yes--while issues should be addressed, while remedies should be attempted, there is no reason for impassioned hate. There is no reason to not give credit where it is due. There is absolutely no reason NOT to forgive trespasses against us; and furthermore, no reason NOT to acknowledge that, in the big picture, these trespasses did not leave long-lasting damage, if we keep our cool about it.
Korean food reminds me not to make unnecessary enemies.
I hope you have something in your life that does the same for you.
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